Friendship....

Friendship...
Ever wonder what that means?
I used to think I knew...however....I have several girlfriends in my life...."A" and "S-Ms.Coffee" & "M-the Partier"...
well...two of the three are awesome friends...there for me no matter what...have my back and brutally honest no matter what. And folks that is what I need!
The other one..."M"...she could have been a true friend. But the issue here is she has been so wrapped up in her own drama...she doesn't seem to care about anyone else.
I mean we all have our bad days, awful baggage...but some of that disolves when you forgo your own needs and help someone else.
I have known each of these WOMEN for years...and I haven't always been the type of friend to them I should have...so...I am constantly working on bettering myself to be there for them whenever they should need me.
Maybe not financially or physically but absolutely emotionally.

You know...Women can be catty, backstabbing, and terrible to each other...that is usually what you tend to hear...but what about the ones who don't do that?
Take time to be there...through thick and thin, through bad relationship to no relationship?

My Girlfriends...A & S are above and beyond! I can't do enough for them or get enough of them...
They are my world...along with my kids...
You know...you are judged by the company you keep and actions speak louder than words.

HMMMM so I wonder...as I tend to ramble on here....
Why doesn't some women like "M" get it?
Move on....heal...get better...take time for others...be honest & loyal no matter how you feel.
All in all, I am dropping her as a friend. Moving on...I have worked too hard to make myself positive and be there for her...she doesn't obviously care about me like that...SHAME SHAME...
and of course ...I feel terrible guilt for walking away.
May MY GODDESSES lead me where I am most needed and teach me patience & kindness.

I talk tough don't I?
I hope I will hold tough and do it...I am such a SUCKER! LOL

Fingers crossed folks..I am headed out!

Shutting that door and not looking back...then why? do I feel so sad?

Oh, well...just breathe!

Good-bye "M"...see you when you perfect yourself enough to be there for others and gain some positive energy back for yourself...until then...Peace!

Well gals & pals...

I am so THRILLED with my bestie "Anastacia" because she has finally started our "Magickal Sisters" blog!

It has been a long time coming and we deserve it!
I dunno that we have lots to offer or sound advice..HAHAHA
But what we have is sparks of ideas...interesting bits of knowledge...tons of questions to get answered ourselves!
That is what it is all about you know...GIRL POWER & Seeking Knowledge...for knowledge is power.
We believe in the Three Fold Law and following the Wiccan Rede.
I am proud of who I am and where I have been...most of all...I am blessed.

So...without further stalling....
THANKS GIRL!

That way this blog can be about my divorce and kids & other items of baggage.....and the other one can be about my love of all things Wiccan!

Peace...

Self Observations...

I have been a very bad girl as of lately....
I have not been taking time for myself, or meditating or even cracking open a book.
I usually love to read, do some yoga, burn incense, meditate & work a few rituals into my day.
Lately I have faltered...laid around the house...ate to my stomach's delight...and did NOTHING.

However...I just recently went out to dinner with my GF..."A" and had a Girls Night out, dropped by Coffee shop for some YUMMY coffee...went to hastings and laid in the floor and giggled at the Astrology books in the new age section...found an awesome book on my Goddess ISIS...and reconnected with my inner wishes to start reading and pursing my BOS again.

Can I just say...Quirky?
I mean just when I have stepped away and given no time to myself and feeling overpowered and run down by life's little problems...in comes a fresh breeze of GIRL POWER and Hand over Heart Love for myself and those around me.

This is where my chosen path is...to enlighten myself...gain knowledge and make time for those around me...including me.

I adore Isis and Mother Goddess...most of all I love myself and my Family & friends.

So, as I climb into bed tonight I will be counting my blessings...and show my appreciation for my gift of life that I have been given and live it to the fullest.
For life is what we make of it and I choose to make the most of mine!

Blessed Be Fellow Friends & Bloggers....Blessed Be...

Pink Panther...

Okay girls...

I have learned a valuable lesson...
When you are at your EX husband's house...don't snoop!
I was just hanging out checking some stuff and a random site to his facebook opened up via his password.
I couldn't help it...it was like i had the angel on one shoulder..no be a good girl!
Then there was that naughty little vixen..whispering..who would know?!
So, stupid me...I snooped...looked in his inbox and yes...found a certain email about me and his certain feelings and his honest, truthful, in confidence opinion tore open my heart and bled it out.

I don't know if its because we dated all thru junior high and high school or he was my first love and married to him for 19 years...but his opinion does matter.
Especially about our kids....
Broke my heart...but I guess I deserved it because I snooped.

He is also entitled to his opinion...after all...I broke his heart by being unfaithful in the end and leaving him and divorcing him...so...he is probably the saint here.
Don't get me wrong...there were tons of instances in our marriage where he faltered..although I will not go into them..they are pointless...my issue here...

DON'T do it...cause even if no one is looking or would know...YOU will and sometimes...you aren't supposed to know.

EVER, ever!

Lesson: learned chalk one up to karma!

Valentine's Day Memo:

Just got done getting myself a jump start on Valentines Day...hehhehehe
A WHOLE WEEK early!
Man...I was walking up and down the isles at Wally World and realized...what a marketing ploy...
There were these men all fretting what to get their women in their lives...from chocolates, to stuffed animals, edible panties, pens with fuzz on the end of them and candles or CD's. WHEW!

You know what I want?
Effort..time...love....consistency each day...
I believe its the small things in life...the words that you never take time to say, the moments that while your head is tilted back he nuzzles you in the hollow of your neck and utters "I Love You".
What about making dinner one night so you don't have to, or getting take out.
What about running your bath & Laying out your pj's and giving you a massage after a nice soak?
What about simply texting you and asking ..."How is your day Sweetie?"

These are the small things I hope for...not gifts...not store bought crap that will add pounds to my large fluffy waist or not the one day Large gesture crap that doesn't mean anything...

Give me a guy like this everyday and I would be a satisfied lady.
Girls? Any other ideas?
One quick tip though....I believe that if I require these things...I should be able to do them as well and I do....my guy...walks in each night to a clean home...hot meal...and a smile and a flirtatious eye wink asking how his night at work went....as I am recently divorced after 19 years...I take NOTHING for granted anymore.

Okay....girls who watched superbowl last night?

I did! it was a really great game alot like life ya know....



They were ahead then the other team bounded forward and upped the ante'.

Then when it looked like the underdog would finish on top....a friggin' fumble or incomplete pass.



If that isn't the motto for my life I dunno what is! LOL



I did get a touch down yesterday from my "Boy Toy" and it was a wonderful GOAL!



Saw my daughter the "Goth girl and her friend...Lispy"

We grilled out...sent them on their way and laid in bed and watched the Superbowl....all in all a great night.