The 3 little Birdies....or Terrors?

I have three nieces that I have driven you all nutz about talking about them....or whining about them and the issues I have faced while The Torch and I are taking care of them....

1st Girl Goofy who is sweet and funny but yet, manages to never HEAR me when I am addressing her unless of course when she wants to...rofl

2nd Drama Queen who is extra cuddly and throws such awful pouting fits and her faces well...you know the old addage "If looks could kill?" yeah...now you get it

3rd Psycho she is autistic has has severe weird moments where she even speaks a newly created language by herself to only herself..then out of the three she has what I call rainman syndrome too....she has the best response w/manners...its uncanny and puts the other two to shame

I have really gotten to know these girls over the past few months...and known that I have no limits...thought I did...then realize that the HUMAN condition when neccessary is capable of performing any task within reason when there are no choices. They are lovely girls...with a bright future, no thanks to their mother (Pill Popper) she has only gotten high for herself over these last few years and I guess it gripes my butt that my Mother (Denial) has decided to cover her back....throw me and my other sister (Superwoman) to the wolves...as long as Pill Popper is taken care of its all good. Besides according to Denial.....Pill Popper is doing so well!
I want Pill Popper to be well...sober....clean and a good mom for these girls, I want it....it always works...always a blessing.
I have never meant it more I promise...because as good as I am...I have raised my own children....and trying to find out who I am...hard to do w/three little girls in tow.

So, I am off to cause havoc today and maybe mixed w/alittle mischief...who knows where this Witch's Path will lead.

Brightest Blessings and I am hoping for some refreshing, cleansing rain today.

JM

this has been an interesting two weeks during my BDAY....

I figured out....I need some ME time every day...just a bit. Also I have realized....there is dirt and mess...and it will keep..omg right! If you know me...you know...that THAT is a huge revelation!
Next....my relationship is NORMAL and really good! LOL
My Boy Toy (which now we are engaged really needs to be changed to THE TORCH) LOL... is a really great man...when my kids come up..he hangs out w/us, plays games....jokes...and tries to connect w/my kids on more than one level...
and no....he may not be MR.Romantic....but he is MR.Dependable and I love that about him. He does these small things for me....like tries to make me laugh, texts me quite alot during day while he is at work, lets me control the remote control, never ever complains about the house or what I cook, goes out on my Bday and gets me THREE huge books about Wicca ...which he knows NOTHING about (he is Catholic) and makes plans to take me and the girls camping on his vacation...he is a great man. Period....
I have been reading a book by Silver Ravenwolf "Hedge Witch" that he bought me....I love it....making me realize....I have enjoyed complaining woe is me too long...I am stopping that here and now...head up...garden gloves on...smile across my pretty little witchy face....I WANT to have a happy, successful, emotionally, physically, sexually rewarding relationship with "The Torch" It Always works, Always Blessed. I find this new mantra...stimulating...and positively uplifting and when I say it I mean it and I SMILE...omgs I smile big time!
I am no expert on life, liberty or the pursuit of anything...but what I do know....is that life is too short...too short to fret...to worry constantly...to muck around and cry all the time....I won't be her.. I WANT better and I deserve it....It always works...always a Blessing...so mote it be.

BTW...had a fabulous BDAY! ;P

Defect label

well....this has been such a long ass week. My feelings go up and down like some damn roller coaster at some amusement park...my migranes are back and to top it off...I can't seem to quit crying....WTF!
I feel like I am in some sort of funk and can't get a grip on it and when i do...i slide back down again and cry some more. OMGS.....I don't know what is wrong with me.
I cook all the time, read and play with the girls and talk to my Boy Toy... but deep down...I know I am missing my BF girl time and also my two fabulous teenagers....stupid huh?
Plus...on some level I know it has hit home that this is my first Birthday this week since my divorce and on this planet....after a 19 year marriage....to my high school sweetie...that is hard.
I am just putting it out there...to write it...get it out...puke it up maybe saying it will do its work and figure out...I am still here, breathing and making it slowly along.
You know....divorce is so damn hard, even if you are the one pursuing it and for the most part me and my EX get along so well....but then there are the times, I think when our human side comes out and he will gash me hard or knock the wind out of me. It takes me a few moments to recatch my breath and stand up again, but the worst thing is this last time...I called him a name...hung up on him....it was awful. I feel awful. I don't want to hurt him anymore in anyway and i did. WHY?
Sometimes....I think....I did him such a favor, leaving.
Then, I wake up and realize...I am ok...it is ok...he will be ok and our Beautiful kids are amazing and strong and capable....then I know I am ok....
funny thing is...after typing this I have quit crying...and seem to be better, now...only time will tell.
So, I will sit back on my shelf and be invisible while trying to hide this damn defective label on my back.

*Peace...I am outta here